windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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