ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
