Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
