What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
