They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Randomize
