you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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