Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
