Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
