I need help removing her.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
