i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
