did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
