as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
