omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
You smell like stripper and shame
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
