Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
