girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
