erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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