I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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