Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Randomize
