cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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