He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
