Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
