Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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