why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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