Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
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