can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Randomize
