Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
