After last night, I could never be a politician.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
