More tranny stories later!
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
