I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Randomize
