I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
