Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
