The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
