Betty ford says i'm here all night
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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