Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize