Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
how drunk are you?
Several
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
