Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I fill condoms, not promises.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
