You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
