He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
