your thong is hanging out like whoa
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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