Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
