absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
