I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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