can we get nightvision for the apartment?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
