my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
