i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
