Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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