Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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