I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Randomize