My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
