Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
