What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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